Valentine’s Day is around the corner and if you don’t have your special someone yet, it’s not too late to steal someone else’s.
That’s right, for some of you savages, it’s Dirty Mackin’ season!
What’s Dirty Mackin’, you say? Dirty Mackin’ is when someone dry hates on someone else to get get into the panties. Not that I condone such behavior, but desperate times call for desperate measures, and if you don’t want to spend the rest of your life alone, it’s time to act fast!
I’ve decided to come up with a Dirty Mackin’ Playlist to help motivate you to go out and get what’s rightfully yours.
Check out my list of Dirty Mackin’ songs below and let me know what you’d like to add.
1. LL Cool J – “Hey Lover”
LL Cool J will probably go down in history as the king of dirty mackin’. He spends the entire song dry hating on a man and snitching to his girl only to find out he doesn’t even know the chick and has been stalking her the entire time. If that’s not Dirty Mackin perfection, I don’t know what is.
2. LL Cool J – “Loungin” (Who Do You Love)
Another reason why LL Cool J is king of Dirty Mackin. The entire song is him asking if you’re sure you want to be with the man you’re with. Then he proceeds to tell you that you’re being ignored, under appreciated and that he’s better.
3. Bryson Tiller – “Don’t”
What happens when you run to the guy you friend zoned and tell him about all of your man problems? He Dirty Macks. Bryson Tiller spends the entire song, line for line, dirty macking on a man by reminding the girl of everything she told him. Then he acts fake concerned with, ” He keeps on playing games and his loving ain’t the same, I don’t know what to say but, what a shame. If you were mine you would not get the same.” Bryson may have just proven himself to be the dirty mackin’ Prince right there.
4. Joe – “All The Things (Your Man Won’t Do)”
Here’s another example of an entire song dedicated to the art of dirty mackin. Joe made his dirty mackin sound so melodic and sweet that it even made me wonder if I was being mistreated.
5. SWV – “You’re The One For Me”
Girls can dirty mack too, you know! SWV were the queens of 90’s side chicks anthems but they put it down in the Dirty Mackin department with the line, “She doesn’t treat you the way you want her to. So come on stop fronting I wanna get with you.” Blunt and to the point. I bet he went too.
6. Mary J Blige – “I Can Love You”
The chorus speaks for itself, “I can love you better than she can…”
7. LL Cool J – “I Can Love You Better”
See everything above about LL Cool J being King of Dirty Mackin.
8. Drake – “Marvin’s Room”
What happens when your drunk ex calls you at 1 am and leaves messages on your voicemail about how you could do better than being with your man? “Marvin’s Room” is born. Drake provided a perfect example of modern day dirty mackin. I mean, he even takes it as far as saying, “f*ck that n*gga that you love so bad” and f*ck that n*gga that you think you found.” If that isn’t dry hating, I don’t know what is.
9. Dru Hill – “I Should Be”
One of my favorite songs in the world and it was all about dirty mackin. The hook alone begins with “I should be your boyfriend because you know he’s lying. It might sound like I’m hating but girl I’m just relating.” No sir, you are hating because the chorus gives explicit instructions on how exactly to break up with your man and get with one of the members of Dru Hill to unleash your dragon. They ain’t slick!
10. Trey Songz – “Can’t Help But Wait”
Trey Songz tries to take the reverse psychology route to dirty mackin. He dry hates, but then ends it by telling you that he’ll just sit back and wait on you, no big deal. Oh but don’t think we didn’t catch all that hate Tremaine. Lyrics like “I see you, you wit him, he ain’t right but you don’t trip. You stand by, while he lies, then turn right round and forgive,” don’t go unnoticed.
11. Pleasure P – “Boyfriend #2”
This one is for the side dude that can’t help but hate on the main instead of staying in his lane. Unlike most dirty mackin’ singers whose goal is to replace the boyfriend, Pleasure P is perfectly content with being a side piece. He’s getting the kitty anyway, he just wants to remind you that your man is wack.
12. Jagged Edge – “He Can’t Love You”
This song tells the story of a man who lost his girl to another man and resorts to dry hating the new guy to get his girl back. This is probably one of the most popular scenarios for dirty mackin.
13. Rico Love – “Trifling”
Rico reached Dirty Mackin Level 10 with this song. Not only does he disrespect your man right in his face, he basically calls him a chump and dry hates on him through the entire song. If your man doesn’t try to whoop Rico’s ass, you just have to break up with him.
14. Destiny’s Child – “She Can’t Love You”
Beyonce and company were on a dirty mackin’ rampage with this one. The song even starts with, “I saw your new girlfriend the other day and i expected for her to be so much more than she was.” Girl!! If that isn’t shade, I don’t know what is!
15. Positive K – “I Gotta Man”
What’s your man got to do with Positive K? This is some throwback dirty mackin’ for that ass and it was probably the first time I’ve ever heard dirty mackin’ become such a commercial hit. When he said “I’m Big Daddy Longstroke, and your man’s Pee Wee Herman” it was pretty much a wrap. The entire song was a persistent back and forth from a brotha who doesn’t care if you have a man at home. He likes ya and he wants ya. Gotta love the 90’s.
16. Trey Songz – “Mr. Steal Your Girl”
Trey Songz has already self proclaimed himself as Mr. Steal Yo Girl, but who would have thought he would have stooped as low as to dirty mack? At first it seems like harmless “take yo chick” behavior, but when he says “He can’t give you what I got here, right now” and “Next time that he leave you all alone, I’ll give you all the love he not, I’m about to take his spot,” he pretty much solidified that scumbag season is among us.