Everyone has dreams. Some people desire to finish college and pursue a career, some desire to become an actor or actress, others choose music. What do you do when the person you are dating has desire but never really does anything with it?
Let’s say you’ve been dating a guy. He’s perfect. He looks great, the sex is great, you get along perfectly but there’s only one problem, he isn’t doing much with his life. He has tons of aspirations and dreams but when it comes to getting up and moving out of his parent’s crib, that’s just not high on his agenda. He means well and believes that one day he’s going to make it, it’s just that either the drive isn’t there or he just doesn’t have the know how.
How long do you stay before you give up on him? Do you immediately assume that he’s never going to amount to anything and cut him off immediately? Would you stick with him and hope that he gets his act together? Would you help him get his act together?
I’ve actually found myself in this situation more times than not and every single time I’m in the situation I always become the girlfriend that tries to help. Sometimes it works in my favor, sometimes I feel like I’ve wasted my time. I have quite a few ties in the music industry (on an independent scale anyway) and I attract a lot of rappers. The problem with attracting rappers is that they’re all “starving artists” and they only want to do music. There’s nothing else in the world that they are interested in other than music. They don’t care if you like their music, they’re going to do it anyway. A lot of times they’re misguided and don’t even know what to do with their music, but it doesn’t matter because they’re in that zone. The problem I’ve always encountered was the starving artist who was the reason he was starving. Didn’t work, didn’t do much of anything really. He barely worked on his music as it was, but a rapper was who he wanted to be and since I was doing what I wanted to do, who was I to judge? Most times I helped by offering my professional advice and guiding him the best I could. I couldn’t go in the booth and spit bars for him nor was I about to post him up on a blog just because he was my boo. But I tried to motivate. Needless to say in my case, he’s still where he was a year ago.
Would I do it over again? Hard to say. I can’t knock someone’s dreams, who am I to do such. I can always try to help, but how long am I supposed to wait? Do I jump ship or go down with it? In my case, I gave it a few months before I got bored and bounced. What would you do?