Ballerific Relationships: Have You Walked Passed Your Prince Charming?

What is a type? What does that even mean to you? For a while I thought my type was good looking, family oriented, a little swag and ambitious.  But aren’t all of those just traits? Can’t anyone could have that if they really wanted too.  All of these do not make someone love you and protect you.

For most of my life I had a “type” I wouldn’t date anyone that wasn’t this height or wasn’t tough or couldn’t fight.  Yes, very ridiculous but I am sure I wasn’t the only one with crazy demands. So my ideal man would be in the category of the “player” or the “cheater”, those where the type of guys that I seem to be more inclined to talk to because they had all of the traits that I liked, not knowing that they were no good.  So I found myself in a never ending cycle of hearing the same excuses; I’ll never cheat on your again, I’m not ready for a relationship even though we have been messing around for 5+ months and so forth. It got to a point that I started to think it was me, what is wrong with me that I can not find a man that has all the traits that I need?

I had to see what my best friends where going through in their relationships to realize the cycle.  We sometimes date the same kind of guy over and over because that is what we are use too.  One of my friends is really into older men, she didn’t date anyone under the age of 30.  Another was into the drug dealers, if he wasn’t dealing she wasn’t talking to him.  And I had a thing for the pretty guys. The one that every woman wants.  Now we would continuously date these kind of men and get hurt over and over again.  Asking ourselves WHY.  But it wasn’t us, it was just the kind of men we were dating who were immature, non committed, and non driven.  You can’t turn a “hoe” into a housewife and you can’t change a man that does not want to be changed!

So I had to think, maybe I should switch up. Date the guy that I would not normally take serious because not all men are the same and maybe this guy will show me something new.  So I went and dated what I would call a “Goofy” guy.  He’s not bad looking but he looks like he could trip on his own two feet.  I personally would not have dated him at first sight because he’s not the pretty boy I’m use to or an aggressor which I like.  He’s more laid back very nonchalant and sweet.

So I tested him out and realized, he could make me happy.  I don’t have women drooling over him. He cares about me and gives me all the attention I want. He’s very open and honest because he’s not trying to be too cool for me.  I can be an complete idiot around him and he’ll do the same.  It’s the little things that make someone love you. I am sure he is not the first choice for a few women and because of that he’s humble. He doesn’t look for the “baddest” female in the room but the one that he could enjoy the company of.

Now I’m not saying lower your standards and get an not so attractive partner.  Because you still have to be attracted to that person.  But be open to everything. Yea, he has a little weight on him but he makes you laugh.  Yea, she does not have an ass but she can cook.  Go for the person that carries a personality that matches yours.   Don’t be stuck in the same position for years, you want a change so make one. But choose wisely you might actually fall in love with the opposite of what you’re attracted to.