Ask TheFetishologist: Sex Advice Column 2


Sex advice column two from the fetishologist. I know I said that these blogs will come sooner, BUT, there hasn’t been many questions coming in. Remember, send them into [email protected] or tweet me at @MizCaramelVixen, Thanks.

The first question comes in from HM via twitter

@MizCaramelVixen how long should I wait to call a girl after I get her number”

Well, HM, it depends on how you two meet up. If it’s at a club, blind date or bar and she gives you her number, I would call her in a few hours, just to make sure that she’s arrived home safely. She’ll reply and take note of how much of a gentlemen you are.

I think any other scenario, you should wait a day to call her, not during business hours, of course. Around 7/8ish and introduce yourself as the guy she met at Walmart or wherever and that you’re interested in taking her out on a date to get to know her a bit better. Sound confident when you call, we can sense a nervous man from the gate.

Good luck HM and let me know how that one goes for you!

This next question comes via email from Love Your Column.

Okay, so I am super busy. And have this “morality” issue that prevents me from just sleeping with whoever makes my panties wet but… The clause is so strong that it’s like Marriage or Friends.

And any – between- humping is just that: In- between.

I want a marriage (not a serious relationship) & don’t have time to cultivate a serious relationship that “may ” lead to one…
So what do I do? How do I enjoy my sexual desires without coming off as slutty and turning off the man who may want to marry (if I didn’t take from him my satisfaction & leave him to wonder what my new number is…which is/was my habit…) ?


Love Your Column!!!!

Whew! Love Your Column, hunty you can NOT have your cake and eat it too mama. There’s NO way possible. How in the heck do you want a marriage, but not a serious relationship? For 1, if there’s no serious relationship it will NOT lead to marriage. You’re worse than Joan from Girlfriends, boo….at least she had a 3 month rule before she dropped the panties. You need to loosen up the “morality” issue and enjoy a relationship…EVEN if it’s just sex.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling you to go out and sit on every johnson there is imaginable, I’m saying live a little. Have fun. If it leads to just sex, cool…if it leads to more than sex, great!

LYC, PUHLEEZE tell me you don’t go out on dates and just spit out, “what do you think about marriage? Do you want to get married?” Chile, if you DO that, I’m going to need to give you a cease and desist order. Take it easy, no one knows where the road you go down during a relationship is going to take you.

Every relationship has it’s ups and downs. Drama and peace. Anger and Happiness. Honey, relationships are WORK! and you don’t want a serious relationship? Lemmetellya….marriage is harder!

So my advice again is live a little, enjoy the date(s) you go on and not every date has to end with you on your back. Take it slow, but understand the flesh is weak and when it wants something that “morality” is out the window.

You’ll be fine Love Your Column, just take it slow!

This last question come in via email from AMB.

I’m 20 years old ill be 21 in December and I have recently started casually dating my first again and he seems to have made up this fantasy in his head that I have learned all of these tricks since we broke up 3 years ago and the truth is I have only been with one other person sexually and he only enjoyed missionary.
I don’t want to be a disappoint to him in the bedroom but I don’t know what to do. I want to be that sexy women to just climb on top and take control but I have never been in that position before. when we were together we were young and not really all that sexually active atleast he wasn’t with me. I can only distract him with great head for a little longer friends say just watch porn and do what they do but someone else said you helped with there sittuation I hope that you can help me miz Carmel vixen I want my man to know every fantasy he has can be fulfield at home.

Going back to exes…sheesh…that in itself TO ME, is a no-no. Especially when he’s made up his mind that you know all these tricks within 3 years, but I digress. One more thing you said casually dating him again, then at the end you want him to know everything can be fulfilled at home. That sounds confusing, chica…but since you didn’t ask me about that, I shall focus on the sexing.

I would say try a little role playing. Unless you know what his desires are truly, you’re going to have to get your guess on and try different things. I have a couple articles on making your man into a sex slave that you can try out to spice up your love life.

If you’re only having sex in your bedroom, GET OUT of there. There are so many rooms to have sex in, explore. Since you want to be the one in control, With role playing you can be the college teacher and he can be the jock student. If he wants to pass your class, inform him the only way that will happen is if he pleases you. Otherwise, he’ll receive a big fat “F” and will be kicked off the football team. It’s all about HIM pleasing you. You can also do the same thing with the boss and employee. You’re the boss and the employee is a screw up and he wants to keep his job, well in order to keep his job, he has to please you in every which way possible. WHENEVER you send for him.

Try those out for size and let me know how they work out for you. Sex can be SO fun and enjoyable and kinky. You have to find your niche and get out there and please your partner!

This is MizCaramelVixen, your fetishologist. Follow me on twitter, @MizCaramelVixen and Instagram miz_caramel_vixen

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