Baller Alert Entertainment & Lifestyle
So, you’ve decided that you’ve had enough of the bachelor life and you are ready to settle down with your baby mama that has been dealing with your sh-t for all these years? Well that’s great! Only problem is in the words of Jay Z, she “don’t believe you, you need more people!”. Luckily for you, I’ve devised a simple step by step guide to get your lady’s trust back, and beat those heauxs off with a stick!
♥ 1 – THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE ♥ From now on the truth and only the truth will get your girl trust you again. This will be hard at first because face it, after years of lying, she won’t believe anything you say. She won’t believe you even if she sees it with her own eyes. The best you can do is just tell the truth. Why? Because it’s harder to get caught in the lie when it wasn’t a lie to begin with. Think of it as a Jedi mind trick.
♥ 2 – GET YOUR HEAUXS IN LINE ♥ Knowing you, you’re probably a Grade A Stud Muffin. I’m sure you had all the young ladies flocking to you. Unfortunately, keeping the young ladies around is going to get you the exact opposite result of what you were going for. This is the time when you contact each and every girl you had on standby and break her pretty little heart by saying “I think I found the one”. For added flair, follow that sentence by saying “Don’t call me on my home number or my chick will slit your throat with a rusty razor blade”.
♥ 3 – THERE’S NO TIME LIKE QUALITY TIME ♥ Having to deal with your deceit for so long has gotten your girl’s insecurity level at an all time high. Want to win her back? Spend every waking moment of every waking day with her until she is somehow convinced in her crazy little mind that there is no possible way you could be messing around. Take her shopping, cook her a nice meal, smother her with love. If the time you’re spending with her doesn’t convince her you are faithful, the kind gestures surely will.
♥ 4 – BELIEVE IT OR NOT, YOU DO HAVE A CURFEW ♥ You don’t necessarily have to come inside when the street lights come on, but do know that the longer you stay out, the more your lady may assume the worst is going on. Make it a practice to come in at a decent hour, sometimes even before she is home. Not sure what a decent hour is? Just ask her, she’ll appreciate it.
♥ 5 – HANG OUT WITH YOUR MARRIED FRIENDS ♥ Everyone has them, those friends that got married and are living the family life. Wife, kids, minivan, the whole sha-bang. Lord knows they need to get out, so put the plastic on the couch and invite the entire family over for dinner. Enjoy a night of bowling or just hit the bar with your married friend (that you haven’t heard from in 3 years). When your girl sees that you’re hanging out with your married boys, she’ll quickly assume their influence will keep you from lusting over single women.
