I like to tell everyone each relationship is different, but there is one thing that I do not just go with the flow about- and that’s the discussion of finances. My feeling is the sooner the better. It’s not first-date conversations, but it’s definitely up there with the short term and long term goals and whether this person wants marriage or kids.
Finances have become a taboo subject, but why? If I’m dating you and we are allegedly “building,” then don’t I need to know what I’m getting into? Do you have a judgment? Are you on child support? If so, are you current or behind? Are you apart of a civil suit? Do you have credit? How much do you owe on student loans? What’s your debt-to-income ratio? What are your feelings on savings and annuities? Do you have life insurance, if so how much? If I sign my name on this dotted line with you, will I be ruining my financial future or not?
Finances are a necessary discussion. How do you or your significant other expect to build if either of you do not possess the necessary bricks or have a stable financial foundation? The number one reason for breakups outside of infidelity is finances. No one wants to struggle financially when they don’t have to. If someone is trying to build with you, they’ll be open. That way you can assess the risks of your financial future.
If finances are shaky, you two can work towards the common goal holding each other accountable. However, the only way you can do that is if you two have the financial discussion early on.