I’m going to take 5 minutes away from writing my book to get some things off my chest. I feel obligated to make some points after reading posts lately. This isn’t a response to the latest fuckery. But a response to what the hell is going on in our society with our children. Lately, I’ve read stories about little boys raping an 8 year old girl, a woman getting shot in broad daylight, and all sorts of other fuckery. I understand that things have been going on for a long time and are everywhere but this shit is getting out of hand. The only way to attempt to slow the effects is to educate our youth. While reading the post about Chris Brown, he said “no one taught us how to love one another”. All I could think of when I heard that response was…isn’t loving one another a requirement that parent should teach their children? I mean damn, my momma taught me that growing up. What the hell was Chris Brown’s mother doing for 18 years? I’m not saying she is a bad parent. But some parents are forgetting to teach their children necessities of life, which is why we have so much crazy shit going on with our children. Yes, parents, it’s your fault (90% of it). Your kids are your responsibility. You have to teach children respect, love for themselves, love for one another, and morals as well as kindness, patience, peace, and self-control.
It’s a sad state of affairs. While driving, I see TVs in minivans. WTF? Kids don’t interact with one another anymore in a car. To me, I think those parents are just being lazy. Therefore, yes, TV and society will raise your children because you are not doing it. The biggest influence on ones life are the parents…period. Some parents really need to grow the fuck up mentally. You had them so raise them accordingly. Your kids should be your top priority and your decisions in life should be based on how it will affect your children and yourself. And I mean EVERY single decision, which includes what you say and what you do. Even the comments you make about people and certain situations. I don’t have kids but there are things I do NOT do around children. I don’t curse around kids. Yes, I can curse up a storm on BA but I don’t curse around children. I try to be a model because they are like sponges. They will do and say everything that you do. I do believe in social responsibility. If I see a boy with his pants hanging off his ass, I tell him to pull his damn pants up. I always try to give a positive message and make a point about life. I do it because I believe in the saying, “it takes a village to raise a child”. It is my responsibility as well to help raise children. I have no problem in telling kids what the fuck they are doing is not acceptable or saying, kudos, for doing such a great job. You should do the same. Kids really want to be the best they can be.
Kids need to be educated. I look at the popular searches on google and yahoo and the majority of the time; it has nothing to do with education. Usually, half of them are about celebrities. It’s sad when that many people want to search information about celebrities and what’s going on in their lives. When, in turn, they don’t have any control of their own lives. I’m not saying that you can’t search the internet for things, but if you are spending too much time on internet and not reading a book or doing something productive that will help yourself or your children, then you got your priorities all fucked up.
What I’m bout to say next might offend some people, but please don’t take it that way. This is directed towards black women. I’m black so I can make this point. I’m not saying other races are not like this but it is dominant in our culture. It’s just the facts. As black women, we ask, why don’t black men act like this or why don’t black men do that. Well, it’s because they were not taught to do so. And it’s somewhat your fault. So, 1) stop having children with loser men. And 2) kids do need a dad in their lives. I know you wanna be independent and raise your kids on your own, but don’t if you can help it. Boys need a man in their lives. Only a man can teach a boy how to be a man….not a woman, which is why males these days act the way they do. For me, one requirement for the father of my children is to be a gentleman and have chivalry. If he doesn’t have that, I’m not having a baby by him. If he is not a man, how can he teach our son to be a man? Or how can he teach our daughter what to expect from a man? Now, there are exceptions to the rule. Just look at Barack Obama. But that is just one in a million. There will be others that will succeed but most will fall through the cracks. The dynamics of our culture is not like others so we gotta do shit differently. If you’re a single mom, I’m not trying to knock anyone’s decisions that have already been made. I’m sure many of you are great MOTHERS….not FATHERS. Some boys will grow up and be just fine but will they act like “men” towards women? I’ll let you ponder that thought. Kids learn through observation. Saying “this is how you act like a man” is one thing, but allowing kids to learn by what one does AND say will have a completely different outcome.
So let’s make some changes with our youth and try to make things better. Teach them better so they can get better. As well as teaching them how to love themselves and one another, respect, contentment, appreciation, gratefulness, independence, motivation, how to be resourceful, kindness, thoughtfulness, etc. Let’s also try to bring back the traditional families and the traditional things. Like not shacking up, getting married first before the kids, having family dinners at the dinner table, and having family night. Also, use quality time to TEACH your children about EVERY aspect of life, which includes even the most basic ones that can be looked over such as loving one self.