Don’t let the title fool you, there are countless ways to mess up a relationship. I’m not talking about the little things or your personal pet peeves. I’m talking about the game changers; the simple but necessary concepts that a lot of people both male and female fumble over time and time again while pursuing a partner. There’s no way to avoid having some form of relationship drama because you will never be, think or feel exactly like your mate but, keeping these simple concepts in mind will surely make it all a whole lot easier to deal with.
Drop The High Expectations
Most of the time your partner has no idea that you are constantly comparing and critiquing their actions against this imaginary “standard” behavior you created in your head. The danger here is that your expectations will evolve and not only will you find yourself unsatisfied; your partner will become frustrated with not being able to make you happy. You have to be able to accept people as they are and not for how you want them to be but, do not misinterpret or confuse dropping unrealistic expectations with lowering your standards.
It’s Okay To Be Mad
I know the good book says we should forgive but, you aren’t doing yourself or your partner any favors by accepting an apology and promising forgiveness when you’re still upset about the topic. A major concept that many people do not understand is; forgiveness is earned. If your partner hurt your feelings and doesn’t want you to be upset anymore then it’s up to them to repair and recover. Forgiveness frees the guilty party from fault and you shouldn’t allow people to assume that you are okay with the situation until they’ve proven themselves worthy.
Be A Better You
Your BF/GF won’t complete you, they won’t even be able to add to you if you are constantly getting lost in them. The key here is to be who you are, and become better as a result of what you both can pour into each other.
Speak On Purpose
This is huge. Sometimes, you really just don’t have to have that argument, the last word, or something to say. Create opportunities to speak you peace once, and be done with it. A lot of times you find yourself repeating yourself because, you didn’t back up your words with action. If you say it, mean it, and don’t accept anything less than what you requested.
Know When To Give It Up
Not the relationship, I’m talking about the cookies and the D. Having a great sex life is vital to having a healthy relationship and a major part of communicating with your mate. Sometimes the best way to end a lot of the bickering is simply, having some hot steamy sex. Done correctly, you will reconnect and forget about whatever it was that had you both at odds in the first place.
-Chantia
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