Money in relationships is an important topic and apparently a form of cheating. 43% of adults who have combined their finances with their significant other said they’d committed an act of financial deception, according to a poll from the National Endowment for Financial Education.
Among the list of acts that fall under financial deception is lying to your partner or spouse about money to hiding things such as cash, bills, or a purchase, the report stated.
The poll surveyed over2,000 adults via a poll given online by The Harris Poll this past June.
Money is often a stressor in relationships and is a leading cause of divorce, which may be because it’s a complicated subject to discuss.
“As a society, we talk about money with the assumption that everyone starts at the same place in terms of understanding, and that is very untrue,” said Billy Hensley, president, and CEO of the National Endowment for Financial Education. He also said that this can make discussions about debt, saving, and spending more uncomfortable.
“At the foundation of it is that we don’t provide enough financial education in schools or in any other venues so people have the confidence necessary to approach these topics early on,” he said.
The survey also discovered that most deceptions happen for certain reasons. Thirty-eight percent believe some aspects of money should remain private, while 34% had discussed money but thought their partner would disapprove. Another 33% were too afraid or embarrassed about their financial status to speak about it.
Of the couples who had experienced financial deception, 42% said that it caused a fight. Others said it caused trust and privacy issues, led to the separation of finances or played a significant role at the end of the relationship altogether.
However, some participants could use financial infidelity to strengthen their relationship — 19% even said they grew closer after, and 16% said the deception helped them communicate more proactively later, CNBC reported.
Hensley suggests that a spouse or partner should come clean if they committed financial infidelity.
Maybe it’s time to recalibrate your financial relationship and say, ‘you know what, this hasn’t worked too well for us, is there a way we should do this that’s better for us?’” Hensley said.
It’s important to note that people should realize that there is no one way for couples to manage money. Some experts suggest some couples should keep their finances separate.
Suze Orman, a personal finance expert and the “Women and Money” podcast host says she had never had a joint bank account with her partner of more than 20 years.
“You have to have money of your own, the last thing you want to do is have to ask permission,” said Orman. “You might have a joint account, for joint expenses, but then you each need your own individual account.”
Couples should also discuss their financial goals to see that they’re on the same page — and check in regularly to track their progress towards those goals.
“If you have shared goals and you’ve talked about the distribution of how you cover your bills and so forth, it takes a level of pressure off to be able to start your relationship or to be able to heal within your relationship,” said Hensley.
Discover more from Baller Alert
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.