Ballerific Relationships – Ride Or Run?

Chile. If I never see the word loyal again it would be too soon. The way people toss the word around you would think it was a game of Hot Potato. Maybe I wouldn’t mind so much if people were using it in it’s correct context. Or perhaps I just wish that women had a better understanding of who deserves loyalty. It is definitely not that guy you’ve been with for five years who habitually cheats on you, is insensitive to your emotional needs and thinks he’s doing you a favor by spending time with you. Nah, sis, not him. I overheard a young lady talking to her friend about how she caught her boyfriend cheating…again. “I couldn’t even cry, I’m so used to it now. I’m not gon’ let a random come between me and mine cus I’m loyal. You know I rides for mine.’ *rolls eyes so hard they fall out of the socket and vacations in Jamaica without me* I was torn between tackling her and hugging her. Po’ baby.

A lot of women let words like loyalty tie them to people and relationships that they know they have no business in. Often we want to be looked at as a ‘rider’ who sticks by their side because we secretly hope that some day they will learn the error of their ways and miraculously become who we’ve made them out to be in our minds. We envision them coming to us and saying ‘Babe, I really admire you for hanging in there with me. I don’t know what I was thinking and I am so sorry I ever hurt you. I promise I will spend the rest of my days making it up to you. There is nothing out there that is worth losing you.”

Does that happen? Sure, it does, but come on.. What are the chances? Where you see staying as a strength, they are looking at your inability to stand up for yourself and go for what you deserve as a weakness. A weakness that they will prey on either until you tire of it or until they do. If they are the one to become exhausted, they get with someone who doesn’t take their crap and do all of the things you wish they had done with you. Sorry, I don’t make the rules, I just learned a few of them the hard way. Being with someone who mistreats, uses and abuses you is not loyalty, it is foolishness… and codependency but that’s an entirely different post. There comes a point when you have to stop riding and start walking… away. Far away. 

Has this ever been you or someone you know? What are your thoughts on being loyal to or ‘riding’ with someone who is not faithful? Are there exceptions?