Why Do We Keep Dating The Same Person Over & Over?

When I look back at my dating repertoire, there are about 4 guys that I’m sure are the exact same person.  Same poop, different toilet.  It’s crazy when you have a “type” that you date, and you can unknowingly fall into the same situations over and over.  Good or bad.

So it makes me think, are people subconsciously attracting these people and situations because it is what they secretly like? Maybe we don’t know what makes us happy.  Or maybe we haven’t learned lessons from one experience, so we keep experiencing it again over and over until we get it right. Or, hell, some stuff is just comfortable!

Or, maybe we are victims of the Projection concept.  Let me throw some psychology at you guys real quick.  Projection is a defense mechanism defined by Freud, where a person takes their own undesirable qualities and places them on others.  Basically, it is not important that these people you date have all the same qualities, but that you, too, have these qualities.  It’s like God bringing people that have similarities with you in hopes that you see them in yourself.  Deep, right?

My personal favorite theory is that we keep dating the same people over and over just because we’re waiting on that one perfect person that will be the “right” version of all the wrong people you’ve dated.

There’s no solid or right answer to this, but maybe you can see which applies to you.

Now, if you are truly unhappy with the people you choose to date, it’s time for you to date outside the box! Don’t be scared.  Give someone a chance that you never thought was your type.  You might just like it.  Don’t be afraid to break the cycle, especially if the cycle leads you nowhere but a place of headass-ness.

Share your thoughts and stories!