Your Friend Dated Him, Does That Make Him Off Limits?

There are plenty fish in the sea, but sometimes you find yourself in a position where your buddy throws back a fish she doesn’t want and you end up catching it. What are the odds? Well it happens more than you think, but is it right?

Let’s talk about WHY it happens? Women like to talk. We talk about our jobs, our family and our men. If he’s doing everything right we’re ready to brag to our friends and when he’s doing everything wrong we’re ready to gripe. Truth is, we’ve probably divulged more of our personal life than what is ever necessary. Women are also very competitive. If you told us about all of the things that are going wrong in your relationship, we can’t help but to think about what we would have done differently in your situation — some just take the initiative to put themselves in your position. It also doesn’t help if you all share the same group of friends or associates. It’s only a matter of time before lines get crossed and feelings are eventually created. There are many instances when a woman can gain feelings for a man, its unfortunate that this man dated her friend.

Because he dated your friend does that make him totally off limits. What if they were never really serious? I feel that if the relationship was never serious it should be okay to ‘go there’. What about if the two were engaged at some point but your friend was the one who broke it off. She claims she fell out of love. Is it okay to push up on her ex then? I mean, she doesn’t want him so does that mean nobody can have him? He’s a good guy, he deserves to be happy.

It’s really a sticky situation any way you slice it. No matter what you do your loyalty is on the line. Even if you talk to your friend about it and she says it’s okay, chances are in the back of her mind she’s calling you a slut for even considering it. But should you miss out on a good thing because your pal got to him first? I feel that it depends on so many different things: How long they were together, how serious they were and if she gives her blessing. I believe that no matter what, before you get serious you should have that discussion with your friend. Now, she doesn’t HAVE to be okay with it but as long as you’ve gone to her and attempted to get her blessing atleast I can say that you did the respectable and adult thing.