Ballerific Relationships: The Real Reason Why People Cheat (A Man’s Perspective)

If you have a television, radio, cell phone or a talkative friend you have heard about cheaters. We all have a theory in our mind on why people cheat, but I am going to share the real reason why people cheat. Some things in life are out of your control, specifically the behavior of others but words play a huge role.

Do you remember the first lie you ever told? Have you ever shoplifted and got away with it? Well this ties into why people cheat. I don’t want to bore with a bunch of science talk but bear with me. Fear is created by your brain. The amygdala deals with memory, decisions and emotions. When you feel fear the amygdala releases a hormone called dopamine which makes you happy. Long story short, purposely putting yourself in situations that you are fearful of will actually make you happy. I am sure some people imagine getting caught cheating as a fearful situation, particularly married people.

Lying increases the heart rate which tricks the body into thinking you are afraid, and when you are afraid your brain will protect you with dopamine. To understand what dopamine does basically cocaine is a synthetic type of dopamine. So every time you lie or put yourself in a fearful situation, your body releases an organic type of cocaine. Chocolate also emulates dopamine and it literally makes your brain experience chemical happiness. Fear also increases sexual arousal, so cheating or lying will make you happy especially if you think it’s wrong. Your brain will trick you into thinking it was a more enjoyable experience when it may not have been.

There is one last piece of the puzzle that we haven’t covered. Jealous people often accuse their partner of cheating, but what they don’t realize is words have tremendous power. Milton H. Erickson came up with a way to hypnotize a person without them even knowing it, this technique is called covert hypnosis. A hypnotist will use certain words to suggest things to your unconscious mind without your knowledge and you will actually carry out said behavior. When a jealous person accuses their partner of cheating, what they are actually doing is suggesting cheating to their subconscious mind. You have no control over your subconscious mind. When a jealous partner tells their lover they want to cheat and they are going to cheat, they are effectively making hypnotic suggestions to their subconscious mind to cheat. In short be careful what you say to people you care about, and if you get cheated on it is almost never your fault unless you are jealous.