Ballerific Relationships: 5 Boyfriend Mistakes You Don’t Know You’re Making – blogged by: @proudlylauren

For those who read the “5 Girlfriend Mistakes You Don’t Know You’re Making” post, you may remember I spoke about my 4 year relationship that devastatingly went down the drain. If you recall, I admitted to my equal contribution to our demise, taking into account all of the invasive, selfish, and condescending mistakes I made throughout. However, I never spoke on the blunders he made that promoted our split; After all, it takes two to tango right? As I replay our relationship, and hear about so many other women’s experiences, I finally bring to you the common mistakes men make in relationships:

1)    Lying

I can only imagine how many “Amen’s” I’m going to get for this one. We all know how detrimental trust is in any relationship, any sort of breach can cause absolute pandemonium. Big lies, small lies, any lie, can cause a rift so try to be as honest as possible; rebuilding trust can take years to repair, if repairable at all.   

2)    Watering the Grass on the other side

When things get rough in relationships, I know a lot of men, who’d rather dedicate energy elsewhere, opposed to locking-in and fixing the problems at hand. If you’re a habitual avoider and would rather pour energy into friendships with other women, or completely detach yourself and commit to nothing but work, or your friends, maybe you don’t need to be in a relationship. Dedicating energy to other things equally, is completely fine, but not if it means being immature and completely neglecting your commitment to the relationship. Which brings me to my next point…

3)    Resistance to Maturity

We all know growing up sucks, between bills, responsibilities, and plain old age, it’s hard to be excited for maturity. But its necessary.  Your woman shouldn’t feel like she’s raising a child; constantly having to repeat the same things, and deal with the same mistakes. If you are still handling things the way you were at 18, throwing tantrums, avoiding accountability, and overall refusing to grow up, you need to take a big boy pill before a real man steps in. There are definitely ways to hold on to pieces of your younger self, but at some point you have to get rid of your childish ways and commit to adulthood.

4)    Lack of Communication

Men, being the sexy Alpha’s you are, often times think you can handle everything on your own, or think its best to withhold information if it means not upsetting your women. And though you mean well, it doesn’t always go over well. Imagine how pissed your woman would be after realizing a bill went to collections, because you wanted to try and take care of it before she could find out. Make sure you all have a clear line of communication, telling her everything she needs to know so she’s not blindsided.

5)    No Goals

If a man has zero desire, ambition, or vision enough to create goals for himself, how the hell can he heave realistic goals for a relationship? Not only is being stagnant non-conducive to you personally, but it’s definitely not conducive to the progress of your relationships either. You can’t help anyone if you cant help yourself. Make sure you have realistic and achievable personal goals, then work on creating relationship goals that integrate with your personal ones.

So fella’s, if you feel like your woman is pulling back, or losing interest, maybe you are guilty of one of the aforementioned mistakes. I challenge you to self reflect, and see where there are room for improvements, make those improvement and watch as your woman slowly falls back in love. Remember: “Happy Wife, Happy Life”.