Ballerific Relationships: He Keeps Pulling You In…Then Shutting You Out…

What is it about a guy that seems uninterested that makes us want him more? What about the guy that says he’s interested, but his actions say something totally different? I don’t know what it is but we love a chase, and unfortunately, we kind of enjoy that little bit of heart break that goes with it.

Let me break it down by giving you an example. You meet a guy, the two of you chat for a few days via text before he asks you out on a date that weekend. Although it’s nothing serious, you have taken an interest in him and would like to get to know him more. The weekend rolls around and you haven’t heard from him all day. Not thinking too much of it, you show up at the location where you two agreed to meet. After waiting thirty minutes, an hour, an hour and a half he texts you to say that he couldn’t make it. With no explanation you say “okay” and go home. The next day he starts texting and calling you again like nothing ever happened and you know what? You let him. And not only do you let him, but you also agree to another date. Why is that? I doubt it’s because you’re such a forgiving person. This guy obviously showed no respect for your time and didn’t even have the audacity to let you know ahead of time that he wouldn’t be making it. It can’t be the sex because he hasn’t even hit you with his dougie yet…so what is it?

I don’t claim to be a psychologist but I definitely will offer an assessment using myself as an example. I think we just love the thrill. No one wants someone who is easily available, or always wanting us. To know that someone will give you attention and just that quick take it away is a reality check yet kind of sexy at the same time. Women are by far the most complicated creatures to grace the earth so its not uncommon for us to keep putting ourselves in these types of situations. But is it for the best? What if a guy continues to bring you in only to push you away? What do you do then?

I personally feel that at some point something has got to give. Yeah, I love a good chase but eventually I get tired of running. If you can’t show me that you’re interested and be serious, you better believe I can show you the door. All women realize this eventually, some just take longer to understand. This is why you have women who find themselves in countless relationships going nowhere when they’re old enough to know better (yes Halle Berry).