Ballerific Relationships: “Sometimes YOU Have To Approach HIM” by @niksofly

So you are quirky…and to some that is the sexiest thing on earth. You don’t exactly drip sex appeal, but somehow your nonchalance oozes it for you. You aren’t the body con dress and red bottoms type girl.  You have no problem garnering attention except when it comes to the dude you WANT. You two run in close circles, however it’s never close enough for you to score his attention. This particular instance is different. He is in view. Like a hawk stalks his prey, your eyes are fixated on him. The plethora of women that surround him has only part of his attention. He seems indifferent to the women. You stand there like a pillar of salt hoping your now awkward fixation on him will score you a head turn. AND IT DOESN’T. However that girl with the stripper-esque demeanor just scored his full attention. You swear he is shallow and only like women of questionable character (this might be true), rave how these type women are winning (that’s debatable), but the fact of the matter still remains- you didn’t go after what you want and now your imaginary nemesis has him. TOUGH BOOBIES!

Some men like the stereotypical stripper type. It’s their prerogative. I’m a sucker for nice smiles and even nicer conversations. We like what we like, but I’m not complaining on why the dude that caught my eye is entertaining Cinnamon, the model/dancer/actor with no credibility, YOU ARE. I get it .You are not conditioned to approach. That is the “man’s” role. You prefer to be pursued. If anyone feels you, I do. However I am going to need for you to stop twiddling your thumbs, hoping your Fairy God Mother makes your dream come true before the event is over.  I’m going to tell you like this here…GO FOR IT! You go after anything else you want in life: that job, the second masters, that two story home in the exclusive neighborhood. Go for him. Women assume a more passive role because they fear rejection. [You have to be extremely wack to get rejected by a single , heterosexual man]. I’m not encouraging you to seduce the man in front of everyone or throw your dignity by the wayside; but to create a situation where you are in eyesight isn’t exactly cheating him out of his role to pursue you.

You have to say you are different before you cross paths.  Stop verbally saying it and let your presence speak for itself.  You don’t have to be scantily clad or cake faced to get his attention, but you will have to be interesting in your demeanor to keep his attention past that three -second glance over. Head to the bathroom, pop that Altoid in (nothing kills the smell of alcohol better than Altoids. I’m pretty sure it’s a disinfectant). Reapply your lippie and go for it. Tell yourself the worst thing he could do is say no . If he doesn’t bite, have you really lost anything? NOPE.  You initially started out without him. If you end without him, you have accrued no losses. You have gained something- an experience. Allow your perfume to greet him. When you get into closer proximity, flash those pearly whites and allow your eyes to tell him “Hello”. Don’t expect that made-for-TV bull where he will fall to his knees awestruck by your beauty.  This is real life. There is a 40% chance he has been approached by women before and has developed an ego.  If he smiles back… you conquered half the battle.  You have two choices: A) wait on him to say something to you or B) Pay that man a compliment over a glass of Grand Marnier. I would encourage you to opt for option B.  Allow your quirkiness to work for you. Be coy and keep it classy.  He will more than likely bite asking for your number before you depart.  ONE POINT FOR THE QUIRKY GIRLS! Whether or not you two bloom into something magical is strictly up to you. I’m just tired of hearing you complain on how the dude you really want doesn’t know you exist and seems only interested in a certain “type”. Honestly, men like to feel wanted just like women. Every now and again stroke his ego and ignite his passion to hunt with a conversation.  Sparking a conversation doesn’t say “desperado”. It gives “ confident woman that is interested”.