Ballerific Relationships: The Heartbreak Cycle By: @milagreee

We are all painfully aware of the heartbreak cycle, boy meets girl, girl breaks boy’s heart, then this same boy goes and breaks another girl’s heart and the cycle continues. But how does this happen? What other reasons are there for this cycle to commensurate in the first place? After doing some research, I have found that there are three primary reasons as to why a jerk is a jerk. First off, you can blame his genetic makeup, he might have had a difficult upbringing that led him to be this horrible young man. You can blame his heartbreak, for leaving such a scar on his heart that he cannot fathom giving it away again and having it to torn to pieces, or you can blame the clear cut lack of self-esteem this jerk has. The jerk usually has an underlying lack of confidence that he needs to cover up with his jerkism.

Obviously, you wouldn’t come to this conclusion immediately because their display of self-confidence seems to cloud your judgment. They seem to come off as a real man, someone who has confidence and someone who could protect you.  You can’t help but assume that they think very highly of themselves due to their little regard to the feelings of the people around them. This persona this man creates is to protect himself, to make sure that he isn’t able to get hurt, either again or ever. He is often rude and insensitive, trying desperately to ensure his heart stays intact.

The twist is that the woman that falls for this jerk’s desperate act is also suffering from a lack of self-esteem. Who else would subject themselves to this kind of abuse? I’ll tell you, someone who doesn’t believe that they are capable or deserving of a guy who treats them NICELY, or with kindness. These women are a pity show because due to their own lack of self-esteem, they condone this behavior and put up with it. They also allow men to believe that this is the tactic they should use when trying to pursue a woman.  These women  do not believe that they are worth a man who truly values who she is. Then there are those of us women that seek a damaged man so that we can “fix” them, but that’s a whole other topic completely.

The moral of the story is that due to some messed up reason, some men can be jerks. Due to some more messed up reasons, women allow and condone this totally unacceptable behavior. Neither party is right or dateable. We need to realize that until we love ourselves, and raise our self-esteem, we are going to attract a partner for the wrong reasons, and we might just attract the wrong partner in the process. Love yourself or no one else ever can.