Ballerific Relationships: Two is Company, Three’s a Crowd – blogged by: @Milagreee

“But he’s my best friend!”

How many times have you heard these words come out of your significant other’s mouth, only to roll your eyes deeply? Seriously, give me a break. I don’t believe a man and a woman can be purely platonic friends. One of the two, if not both, will have interests that go beyond what a pure friendship is. The man might listen intently as the woman cries and cries about her current relationship, hoping that eventually, (miraculously) she will open her eyes and see who she truly wants in front of her. Him. Meanwhile, he’s so far up the friend zone that there’s no possibility for him to make it out in one piece. The woman might be the man’s best cheerleader, supporting everything that he does, talking him up when he feels low in hopes that this platonic relationship leads into one of romance and passion. In his head, she’s one of his boys, with girly parts.

To me, there is no such thing as a pure friendship between a male and a female. Perhaps, they have already been together and it didn’t work. Perhaps one craves more from the other. But in the background, lurks the danger that the female friend who your man is close to, has deeper feelings than she lets on. This makes dating someone with a best friend of the opposite sex nearly impossible. Do you know what it feels like when this person puts his “best friend” ahead of the health of your relationship? Pure demise. You have just been replaced by, not his “boys” but by another female. Only the thought of causing her excruciating pain crosses your mind. Dealing with this situation can be detrimental to your relationship. Jealously ultimately could arise and cause this relationship to plummet to the land of no return.

Again, I don’t and have never believed that a man that wanted to be my “friend” didn’t have some type of interest in me that went beyond a platonic relationship. We have all had that “friend” who we threw into the friend zone, that we confessed our deepest secrets to, who knew the parts of us we didn’t share with most of world, but at the same time, we never saw a future with him. Eventually, this poor guy would take a risk and try his luck, only to be shut down and returned back to the dreaded FZ.

 y advice when dating a man whose best friend is another female is to run for the hills. One of them is interested in the other and you are sure to either have a constant battle with him or seep with hatred for said friend. You will come off as a jealous and insecure woman if he’s not interested in his best friend. She hates you to the core and you know it, while she simultaneously smiles in your face. You know her intentions, and asking him to cut her off will surely make you look bad. You will feel betrayed if he doesn’t cut off their relationship. Or you don’t ask him to, assuming that he will eventually, only to be let down. So run, and find a man who hangs out with his boys. He’s not likely to sleep with them and it will be one less headache to deal with.