Going through a breakup can be tough for anyone, especially if the relationship was serious. When going through these tough times, we begin lashing out and doing things out of the ordinary to make us feel better. But, does it really make us feel better or is it just a temporary feeling?
It is understandable to have that urge to f*ck ish up because your mate cheated on you or took it as far as leaving you for someone else. At times, we cannot help our reaction during these circumstance because it was unexpected and we do not know how to react.
Growing up, our parents or older siblings would talk to us about everything from sex to dating. Why don’t they prepare us for heartache?
Breakups cause you to make drastic decisions. I wish someone talked to me before I began busting windows, slashing tires or cutting my hair.
Here are 10 things that I wish someone shared with me after my first breakup:
Do Not Stalk Their Social Media: Stalking your exes social media does nothing but cause more heartache, especially if they have moved on. No need to go through their photos trying to piece certain events together, so that you can call him and curse him out. Of course, some people are in denial on whether or not they are a stalker. If you find that every time you log onto Facebook or Instagram you are checking their page, you are a stalker. Let it go! You will see that if you cut that toxic out of your life, you will feel a lot better.
Do Not Continue Having Sex With Your Ex: The worst thing to do while going through a breakup is continuing to have sex with your ex. I don’t care how good they are in the bedroom. If you continue to let him give you those unlimited orgasms, you will never get over him. Sex confuses things, especially with women. Emotions begin to fall into play, which will have your feelings all over the place.
Stop Drunk Texting/Calling: Usually after a break, you hang out with your friends to get over the ex that broke your heart. While you are out, make sure you don’t happen to drunk dial them or text them while calling them every kind of negative name you can think of. Also, you don’t want to call them crying and trying to find ways for you two to get back together. Alcohol and their number can end your night in frustration and more heartache.
No Need For Revenge: I actually learned this the hard way. In the back of our minds, we think that if we do the same thing they have done to us we will feel better. Well, I am here to tell you that it doesn’t feel good. Sometimes it can blow up right in front of you and cause you even more pain. Karma is real, so let her do her thing!
Stop With The Self-Pity: Don’t blame yourself for the breakup, especially if it wasn’t your fault. We often question ourselves hoping to find the answers we are lacking. “What did I do to deserve this?” “Why would you do this to me?”
Don’t Read Old Messages/Letters: After a breakup, have you ever found yourself reading through old text messages reliving the moment? Let them go ASAP! Delete everything from the messages to emails. Hell, even delete their contact information out of your phone. I know you know their number by heart but try not to dial it.
Do Not Beg for Reconciliation: Whether you broke it off or vice versa, you should not beg them to take you back. Don’t let anyone feel that they have that much control over you. It’s not worth it.
Do Not Communicate With Your Ex: Cut off all types of communication, including their friends and family. The worst feeling is knowing that you have ended things and you are still attached to them in some way. When you break up, so does the family and/or friends. No need to make the situation more difficult than it has to be.
Don’t Rebound: There are some people who may disagree with this one but dating someone right after a breakup is not a good idea. It is not fair to you or them, unless you have an understanding. Take time out for yourself before jumping into another relationship. Many say that the easiest way to get over someone is to get under someone else. Jumping into a relationship soon after a breakup can cause confusion on your end and you don’t want to lead anyone on. Take things slow.
Never Give Up: Never give up on yourself. Don’t let someone make you feel like that you aren’t worthy enough to live. Life is too short. Who’s to say that your ex was the “one” for you anyway? There is someone out there that will love and appreciate you unconditionally.
What would you add to the list?