You Can’t Help Someone Unless They Want Help



As I navigate through life with the absence of my mother, I find the things she instilled in me to be more true. For some of us, we were just born with the “help” gene. Anytime we hear a sad story or see someone seemingly struggle financially, emotionally , physically, career-wise or a combination of the aforementioned, we want to administer aid.


While that’s a noble quality, the problem is no matter how bad you wish to help someone, they must first want the help. The thing is, no matter how much we want for our friends and loved ones to be successful, it must be wanted by them.

An alcoholic won’t stop drinking excessively until he/she is tired of being inebriated. An addict has to want to be free from the chains of narcotics before help can be rendered or appreciated. A person suffering from depression has to want to climb out of that hole.

We can want these things for others, but they have to want them for themselves. Until they do, attempting to help them will be frustrating and possibly pointless. But don’t give up on them. Instead, understand that they’re not ready, and be prepared for when they are.

About niksofly

I don't write to appease those that are unsure of themselves. I write to create a space for thought and conversation.

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