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Dear America, Stop Christopher Columbusing Us

by Eleven8
October 15, 2019
Reading Time: 3 mins read
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Christopher Columbus did not discover America. His GPS got him lost and he stumbled upon an already inhabited land and rather than admit to his King that if he had an iPhone instead of an Android this would’ve never happened, he slaughtered, slayed and ran off the rightful “owners” of that land and then called it his own. Ever since then, brown folks couldn’t have sh**.

It’s now 2014 and as progressive as things have become, I still find that Urban Culture still finds itself Columbus’d. Urban Culture does not necessarily mean black. It’s bigger than the black race. Tons of races make up urban neighborhoods and just the same, they’ve been stolen from.  Just last year Miley Cyrus invented twerking and despite how inappropriate and disgusting it was when Black and Hispanic girls did it on Youtube out of the comfort of their living room, Miley managed to make a killing for it. Don’t believe me? There have been many think pieces written about it. Alexander Wang has also taken it upon himself to jack the ideas of struggling streetwear designers and make them ‘high end”. Now you can see women rocking Air Jordan inspired purses, yay! Earlier this year Kendall Jenner was praised by Marie Claire for her trendy “bold braids”. Trendy? Bold? We wore this style all through out middle and high school but what can I expect to the people who saw Alicia Keys corn rows and instantly thought she was copying Bo Derek.

Now fast forward to NY Fashion Week where Urban Trash became Fashion Treasure within the blink of an eye. First DKNY models were spotted with gelled down baby hairs and zig zag parts to which Lucky Magazine referred to the style as “wild” and “instant edge”. Ever since I got into the 10th Grade I described the style as “Mom, I’m grown, stop doing my hair like a hoodrat!” Shortly after Chanel dropped an “urban tie cap” aka durag, Louis Vuitton introduced their Damier bandana set in what we would consider Crips and Bloods colors, and now most recently a member of the America Junior Ryder Cup Golf Team says he “invented” the Shmoney Dance. Yes, the same Shmoney Dance BOBBY SHMURDA had everyone on Vine doing this Summer. The same SHMONEY DANCE that was named after him. Apparently some pre-school kids invented it, go figure. 

This is the thing, I don’t mind being inspired but one thing I can’t stand is taking things the Urban Community does/says then saying you invented it as if it was never done before. Corn rows, durags, bandanas, etc are all scary and inappropriate when someone of color does it but the paler you are, the safer you are. And the worst part is that Urban America isn’t even given credit until we raise a stink. Remember that entire article in Vogue about how Big Butts are such a new thing and they attributed much of the sensation to J-Lo and Iggy Azalea? NEW? really? Sir Mix-A-Lot is rolling in his royalty money right now.

It’s not that we WANT to claim big butts, twerking, gang colors, gelled down baby hairs and durags. We’re not only over those phases in our lives, we’re embarrassed by them. The truth is,  we’re tired of being TRENDY. Everything we do isn’t a trend, it’s just what we do and for once, if you “borrow” from us, give credit where it is do. I feel like the urban world is in a cage in some social zoo and we’re being watched like animals, just waiting for us to do something worthy of applause. Cut it out, America. We let you get away with Elvis, it’s getting old now.

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