Eliminating Self Doubt: Be Your Number One Fan – blogged by: @proudlylauren

Some days we wake up with the most confidence in the world, while others we are down and out, and can’t figure out why. We often blame the forces beyond us, like a cloudy day, for our “blah” attitude, when in all actuality, it’s us. Yes, there are people who have good days on a cloudy day, so blaming the weather, or anything else, is nothing more than an excuse. We subliminally make decisions all the time that affect our self-confidence and we don’t even realize it. But, that stops today! No more moping for no reason, or blaming clouds for your mood: take control and stop doing these following things that make you doubt yourself:

Not keeping your word: Anytime you tell yourself you are going to do something; like clean your house, or you make a promise to someone else, but don’t follow through, you have unknowingly disappointed yourself.  Without even thinking about it intentionally, you know what you were supposed to do, and you know that you didn’t do it. So, stop disappointing yourself. Make sure everything you promise, you will follow through with, and if you can’t, don’t even offer.

Not doing your best: Again, you know what you are capable of, therefore you know when you gave your best effort, and when you didn’t. When you don’t give your best, you walk away from the situation wishing you could have done it differently, or better the first time. You again feel disappointed, and waste energy wishing you could go back and do it over. Instead of wishing you could change what you did, make sure you are geared up to give your best in whatever it is, the very first time. Even if it doesn’t turn out successful, you’ll be confident enough to walk away knowing you did the best you could, and won’t have to spend any energy thinking about what you could have done better.  

Not being honest: I know your grandmother always told you, just like she did me, one lie leads to another lie, that leads to another. By the time you look up, you can’t keep up with the first lie you told, or why you even told it. You use all this energy coming up with false facts, then you have to remember what you said, come up with another lie to support what you said, and make sure to stick to the same imaginary story for as long as you can. Meanwhile, you’re thinking the entire time how you should have told the truth, wishing you could go back Too. Much. Energy. On top of that, your burdened with the fear of being caught in your lie, worrying if your story makes sense. Instead of occupying your mind trying to keep lies together, tell the truth, and be confident in your word.

Telling yourself you are going to have $1,000,000 in the next year, with a plan no more strategic than playing the Powerball to make it, is so unrealistic, it’s funny. Broader example, is setting a goal for yourself, you know is humanly impossible to achieve. All you’re going to do is beat yourself up every time you don’t satisfy it. So, the best thing to do is rearrange your goals to be more realistic and attainable. That doesn’t mean they have to be super easy goals, or non challenging, but just not absolutely impossible to attain.

We unknowingly make these simple mistakes everyday, not understanding the affect it has on our mood, and confidence. Stop creating unnecessary self-doubt and make it a habit to be honest, keep your word, do your best, and be realistic in your expectations. Once you see how good it feels to be in control of your mood no matter the outside circumstance, avoiding self doubt will be like second-nature to you.