Oprah Winfrey is once again speaking candidly about why she decided against marriage in her nearly 35-year relationship with partner Steadman Graham.
According to Fox News, Winfrey shared her philosophy in an essay published in O Magazine.
“I realized I didn’t actually want a marriage. I wanted to be asked,” Winfrey recalled after accepting Graham’s 1993 proposal. “I wanted to know he felt I was worthy of being his missus, but I didn’t want the sacrifices, the compromises, the day-in-day-out commitment required to make a marriage work.”
Winfrey credited the success of their relationship, which began in 1986, on Graham’s ability to have an identity beyond “Oprah’s man,” as well as the fact that they “relish seeing the other fulfill and manifest their destiny and purpose.”
Winfrey said they preferred to have a “spiritual partnership,” citing spiritual guru Gary Zukav’s definition of the term — “partnership between equals for the purpose of spiritual growth” — as a descriptor of their relationship.
Even without an actual marriage, Winfrey still gushes about her man after all these years. “Anyone who’s ever met him is always amazed by what a genuine gentleman he is,” she said. “He’s so positive. Wants the best for me and everyone he knows. Truly wishes people well. Doesn’t curse… Never have I heard him gossip or say a negative thing about anyone.”
The media mogul added: “He’s appropriately named because he’s steady as a mountain. Even-tempered, accountable, trustworthy, patient.”