So you were in a relationship with the man you thought would be your last, when out of the blue he decides to end things between you all; leaving you devastated and heartbroken. You start to picture life without him, and just can’t fathom the thought of it; I mean who’s going to understand your corny jokes, or rub your feet when you’ve had a long day? But as time goes on, you begin to mend your broken heart and try to move on, when you realize; ex-bae is still calling, he’s still hitting you up late night, trying to hang out, and secure what seems to be some type of weird, post relationship, convoluted friendship.
You’re obviously a little happy, because that’s your comfort zone, but you’re also understandably confused why he’d break up with you, only to still want to be around. Men are weird creatures, but only because we allow them to be, read below why he’s still around.
He’s Monkey Barring you
If you don’t remember how to monkey bar, you hang on to a bar with both hands; when you are ready to move, you take one hand and place it on the following bar while the other hand supports you on the previous bar. Eventually you move the supporting hand to the following bar as well, but only when you are comfortable enough. That’s exactly what he is doing by staying around. He wants to move on to the next girl, but isn’t completely ready, so he’s going to keep one hand on you and the other on the next girl. Once he is ready, he’ll let go of you completely and move on to the next.
Wants to Have his Cake and Eat it To
This is pretty self explanatory; if you are giving him any of the privileges he had when he was in a relationship, knowing he’s out here living a single life, you are giving him the best of two worlds; yours and the single one. He’s not going to say no to one, if he’s realized he can have both. Why not have someone holding it down like a girlfriend, while you live the bachelor lifestyle.
No One New
When he first wanted to break up, the single life looked like a tall ice cold glass of water on a 100° day. But once he got a real glimpse of all the crazy, shallow, and money hungry thots, he realized the single life isn’t all its cracked up to be; so he came back to what he knew to be safe: you. Had he found someone he was interested in, he may not have been back.
But what do all of these have in common? The fact that you allow it. He can’t come back into your life if you don’t let him. If he knows you still have that weakness for him, he’ll absolutely use that as his loophole to stay around. He doesn’t want that old thing back, he just wants the comfort that comes with you and all of the history you have. Think about it, if he can still reap all the same benefits, with none of the work, why not take advantage. Understand that even though he is still around, it may not be for the reasons you’d hope; like mending the relationship. Instead, its likely for his own selfish reasons, so if you don’t want him around, cut him off the same way he tried to cut you off!
Discover more from Baller Alert
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.