Security or Sacrifice?: A Woman’s POV – blogged by @a_shewrites

Over time, the list of requirements and qualities that women want in a man either diminishes or triples. There are countless numbers of women who just want the basics and are not very picky at all. They just want a good guy that will be careful with their fragile hearts . These are the women who are asking for the bare minimum. But when the specifics come into play, the lists of what women want could become extensive. Even as little girls, women have been groomed to seek a man who is stable financially. Things like “Make sure he’s a hard working man”, “Get one that’s good with his hands”, “Find a lawyer or doctor”, “An entrepreneur, a businessman, mega mogul ”. These are the things that have been stressed to young women at an early age and continues to replay in the back of [our] minds. Eventually, a woman becomes rational and feels that no matter the occupation, you just want your man to be a great provider.

The thing [we] seldom realize is that most working men, hard working men, don’t have that quality time to spare. He can give you the world but won’t have time to enjoy it with you. Now this is where most women run into problems. He’s overly qualified and has more potential than you initially bargained for. He’s the ideal working man, yet he doesn’t have any time for you. Maybe he runs his own business, a rising success and grosses figures that make him even more admirable. Maybe he calls you all day while working just to let you know that you’re on his mind. Date night twice a week is fine, but its just not enough. The time he spends with you means everything and you’d rather him choose his relationship over his career.

He could be at the highlight of it all, spending late nights at the office trying to close out the biggest deal of his lifetime. He could be at the beginning stages and doing some serious overtime just to get to the top so that he can be the man you need. A provider. And still, you care about none of this, you’d rather spend time with him. This reason alone is why men feel that they can never really please a woman.

This can put men under pressure and cause a strain to the relationship. “She’s never satisfied”. Men that work don’t have time and men that have time don’t work (or is hardly working). Women want a man with money but doesn’t realize the sacrifices that come along with it. Thus it results in an growing numbers of unsuccessful marriages and even more single women.

Needless to say, some of the most successful and wealthiest people are the loneliest because they understand that in order to flourish you have to be selfish with your time. And they too understand that in order to balance a successful career and a fulfilling relationship, that their partner will always compete with their profession; a profession which requires endless amounts of time away from the person you love.

In what ways do you think couples can learn to balance such a crucial aspect of any relationship? Is there really a sacrifice to have that security?