The Sidechick’s Guide To The Holidays

So you’re a sidechick and while you’ve already made the decision about what position you plan to play in a man’s life, the holidays are quickly approaching and you aren’t quite sure how you are going to get through it. Well girl, I’m here to help you make it through and not mess up your ‘good thing’ by being all complicated.

The cardinal rule to being a side chick is keeping your mouth shut. This is more important during the Holiday Season. It’s especially hard this time of year because we, as women, tend to be very emotional at times and the holidays always brings out the emotions in us. The best way to handle a situation like this is for you and your guy to celebrate early. Maybe you don’t get Thanksgiving on Thursday like everyone else, but what’s so bad about left overs on Black Friday? How about exchanging Christmas gifts on New Years Eve? That sounds cool doesn’t it? It’s time to determine with your guy when the side-chick holidays are. Either before or soon after you two should plan to spend time together. What he tells his wife in order to make this happen is none of your concern.

Try to keep yourself busy/entertained during the main chick holidays. Look into charity work like wrapping gifts, feeding the homeless or visiting children’s hospitals. This will get your mind off of the mind blowing side-chick sex you could be having and allow you to focus your energy on good and positive things. Make someone else’s holiday even if you’re not technically celebrating today.

Family is also very important during this time of year. Try to reconnect with family members you may have lost touch with while you were chasing behind some other woman’s husband. Organize dinner at your home or go out to eat. Spend the day with people who love you and wouldn’t mind spending the actual Thanksgiving day with you. It’s imperative that you keep your spirits high to avoid your mind drifting and you acting out. Again, emotions.

A good side chick must NEVER under ANY circumstances contact her man during the holidays. No “Happy Thanksgiving” texts, no late night phone calls, no “Wish You Were Here” messages. None of that! He is with his family and as a side chick you knew the rules a long time ago. Don’t let your feelings get in the way now. You must also be very clever. Be careful not to answer strange text messages from your man. If he texts you and he’s asking questions, or doesn’t seem like “himself”, it’s probably not him at all. It’s his wife and she found the unlock code to his cell phone. Wives are tricky these days.

As a side chick know that your man wants to keep you just as happy as he keeps his wife, otherwise he wouldn’t have kept you around for the holidays at all. It’s your right to expect a nice gift as a thank you for your loyalty and understanding. If he does not get you something nice for the holidays you have every right to end the relationship with him. You may be a side chick, but you put up with a lot to keep his little “secret”. You have the right to at least be treated with SOME respect considering HE is the one stepping out on his relationship. The least he could do is buy you some nice jewelry for your time.

Hoe Hoe Hoe! Carry on!