The Ten Office Worker Commandments (Commandments 1-3)

We all grew up in some sort of group setting, it all started in kindergarden or daycare. The group setting would unfortunately never go away. For the rest of your life you would be in a group setting throughout school and the workplace. Sadly that means you will need to some extent adhere to social expectations or atleast acknowledge them. In this article I will teach you how to foresee issues and drama and avoid them all together.

1.FRIENDS

Beware of the overtly friendly with a million questions. Whoever has the most questions is a gossip. Just tell a lie to someone and if someone else approaches you about the lie, then you know where it came from. A gossip is usual a jealous guy or an insecure woman. The jealous guy is trying to find something bad about you because there is so much good. The insecure woman is doing the same but as we know women are emotional, so they pay more attention to detail. For example a woman will harp on you for having chipped nail polish or not wearing matching bra and panties. For whatever reason people don’t like you that don’t even know you. Maybe you are too intelligent or you smell too good or whatever. All the positive things about you are a reason someone secretly hates your guts, trust me.

2.TOPIC

Beware of the coworker who always makes every conversation about sex, or makes sexual jokes. This is a dry way of flirting and don’t take the bait. People who are stupid enough to sleep with their coworkers always end up in a bad situation. There are 7.3 billion people on earth, choose someone you don’t have to see every single day. Things can possibly go left and you don’t want to see someone you despise everyday and be reminded of the mistake you made. For example my supervisor is a married white woman, with a white husband and two kids. Her husband is disabled and abusive so she started sleeping around to get revenge. Now she is pregnant by a black coworker, who is also married with three kids. Ask yourself how can this situation end well? Keep the subject matter of your conversations at work appropriate and clean because you are surrounded by enemies and backstabbers whether you know it or not.

3.SOCIAL MEDIA

I don’t need to  list the major social media apps, we all know which ones are most popular. Social media was created by the federal government to give you the opportunity to snitch on yourself. The concept of snitching on yourself via social media may sound foreign to you, but nobody loves social media more than the FBI, DEA and homicide detectives. People lose their jobs for sharing unpopular opinions on social media. Know that you are being watched and don’t say or do anything you aren’t willing to be questioned about. The FBI can subpoena your text messages and all your social media posts to use in an investigation, so be careful. Again you are surrounded by backstabbers and enemies whether you believe it or not. For example my supervisor called the FBI on me and told them I am faking my identity and selling counterfeit goods on the internet based on instagram posts. I was booked and fingerprinted. The investigation lasted six months, then they realized she said I started faking my identity before I even started working at my current job. So long story short my supervisor didn’t even know me at the time she claimed I was committing said crimes. I was exonerated of all charges and left with a valuable lesson. If you trust people who don’t lie next to you at night or eat with at your dinner table every night, you are asking for trouble.

TO BE CONTINUED……