In a preview of this week’s episode of Red Table Talk, Jada Pinkett Smith said the “biggest wound” that comes out most in her personal relationships is a lack of protection.
Jada and her co-hosts Willow Smith and Adrienne “Gammy” Banfield-Norris sat down with Mother Hunger author Kelly McDaniel to discuss mother-daughter dynamics.
“My thing was, just, not having protection. That’s my biggest wound that comes out in all my relationships,” Pinkett Smith revealed. “And I’ve looked for [the] craziest kind of protection, and I don’t have a really good sense of what’s safe and what’s not.”
“I’m either extremely protective or extremely defensive.”
Banfield-Norris, Jada’s mother, believes it all started when her mother, who was a figure of safety and security for Pinkett Smith, died when Jada was in middle school.
“And I’ll tell you why. The environment. It was my addiction. She found her security through my mother,” Banfield-Norris continued. “But, when Mommy died, that’s when my addiction really took off.”
“She died when I was still in middle school, you know, 11, 12 years old,” Pinkett Smith notes.
It was a turning point for their family, and it impacted The Matrix actress’ sense of security going forward.
“That’s a really important time to feel secure and safe,” Banfield-Norris explained. “And that’s when your womanhood starts,” Smith notes.
“And that’s when she lost her security,” Banfield-Norris adds. “My mother was her backbone.”
After the death of her grandmother, Jada says she no longer felt safe, which led her to search for it out in the world.
“Her house was safe,” Pinkett Smith shares. “And so, once she was gone, there was no safety, so then I went into the world and created my own safety, and that was crazy.”
The full Red Table Talk episode will stream Wednesday, May 25 at 9 a.m. PT/ 12 p.m. ET on Facebook Watch.
get over it you’re an old bald woman now