Ballerific Relationships – The Toxic Men in My Man’s Life By: @milagreee

The dork, the broke dude( he’s the one who didn’t have money to pitch in for the bottle at the club but the first one to post the picture with the bottle on Instagram), the “im not sure of his sexuality because he’s a little too in love with my boyfriend friend,” the I have no job so I spend most of my time in your boyfriends apartment eating all of his food, the one that stays over just a little too long, the single one that wants to take him to the strip club every night, all of these friends of your man can really put a damper on an otherwise healthy relationship. The problem with complaining about the nuisance your man’s friend are can cause in your relationship is that the way that you tell him might come across as though you are a little bit jealous and he might just relay this complaint to his boys. Now you have a bigger problem, these men now view you as that bitchy girlfriend that doesn’t let him “spend time with the boys” and that is just not the place you want to be.

A part of loving your man is loving his friends, or at least tolerating them for both the sake of your man and the sake of your relationship. Unless this friend is totally toxic and a secret hater (because we all have these undercover haters), you should try and find the things that your man loves about these dudes in order to find a way to tolerate and like them as well.

There are the exceptions that actually damage a good man and he might not be able to see it. As I previously stated, there are those toxic guys that can’t be genuinely happy for anyone if they’re doing well and even if it isn’t maliciously or consciously start to hate on the fact that they’re doing well. I feel as though keeping positive people in your life helps you strive and keeps you ambitious. If you surround yourself with negative people, you are bound to turn into one and are less inclined to move forward with your life and succeed. If you bring the instance where your man got a raise and Hater number 1 started to clown him about becoming part of corporate America and following “the man” you should bring this to his attention. If he is as smart and as ambitious and driven as you give him credit for being, he is sure to see that this is a toxic relationship and he should try and put an end to it as soon as possible.

There are those friends that are only around because they want to suck the life out of your man and are consistently using him. If he has a good heart and is blind to his friends malicious intent because he is a good person and he will do anything for his friends, it leaves you in a sticky situation. You don’t want to start bashing his friends because again, you don’t want to sound as if you are just bitter. You want the best for your man.

Although you might find some of your man’s friends extremely annoying, at the end of the day, they are just being guys. Unless these men are obviously users, toxic, or haters, your best bet is to try and find the reasons why your man loves them and embrace that. Try and get along with them because these people are probably like family to him. Your man chose to be close to these people and you should respect that enough to try and get along with them for the sake of his happiness, and ultimately yours.